The MEPS Slim Down

So most of you already know, I joined the Navy earlier this month.  And as you also know, if you read that

post, I had to drop some weight to do so.  In my journey to weight loss I discovered an ancient secret that I'm about to share with you...a secret that will help you lose any amount of weight you want...

Are you ready?...

EAT LESS, SWEAT MORE. 

That'll be $25 each, please.

I'm bout to market this ish and make a fortune.

Real talk people, the secret to weight loss is simple:  you have to burn more calories than you consume.  To do that, you have to eat less and move more.  Sometimes life really is just that simple.

Now if you've been following this blog you know of my weight loss struggles.  You know I tried everything:  changing my diet, changing my workout routine, spending $89216 on stupid fitness DVDs *cuts eyes to Insanity*, and nothing worked.  I lost maybe 3 lbs doing all of that, and that was over the course of several months.  I just lost 10 lbs in 2 weeks.  I was literally losing lbs. every other day, trust me, I weighed myself.  Four days before MEPS I was 143 lbs.  On the day of MEPS I was 138 lbs, and yesss I was eating.  Ya'll know how I feel about food.  God is good and food is great.  And the church says:  Amen.

Elliott Hulse

I got the idea for the weight loss from watching this dude on YouTube named Elliott Hulse.  He's a professional Strong Man and seems to really know his stuff.  I trust no one and he does come off hella arrogant at times, but I encourage you to Google anything he says to vet it - we all know the internet doesn't lie, right...  But for reals, I judge people's legitness from their own physique.  I'm totally ignoring everything you say if you look worse than me.  WTF am I supposed to learn from you?!  If you're fit and aren't talking about taking a bunch of pills and whatnot, I'll at least listen to what you have to say.  Basically what I'm saying is, Elliott's physical progression (which can be seen over the course of the videos in his channel) is great, therefore I believe him.

Fasting & Hunger Pangs

What he talks about in the video is intermittent fasting.  It's exactly how it sounds:  don't eat during the day a couple times a week.

*SN*  Remember when I said I actually gained weight during Insanity?  He explains why in the video.  Now I know my body isn't weird.

Fasting means you eat in the evening but not during the day, so I would make sure dinner was extra nutrient-packed to make up for the other missed meals.  He suggests Mondays and Fridays.  What do they have in common:  they're near the weekend.  By fasting on the day before the weekend, you essentially increase your caloric allotment for the weekend.  This allows you to be a little more relaxed about your weekend eating.  This does not mean eat like a starving child.  It does means you can have those precious chocolate chip pancakes you love to make every Saturday morning *eyes to bag of chocolate chips in cabinet*  By fasting on Monday, you can off set the increase in calories by using the extra you accumulated over the weekend for when you're not eating.  Tuesday-Thursday is standard eating; small meals, no cakes candies, cookies, joy, or soda.  Since he studied nutrition and the like in school, he's able to go into details about how you should divide up your carbs and proteins for the week.  But if you're like me and ain't got time for all that math, just don't eat like a fat horse.  Veggies, sweet potatoes, chicken, steak - if you're feeling daring, fruit, post workout protein drink, eggs, and spinach, lots of water.  Naturally this isn't an all-inclusive list, just some suggestions.

Starbucks!  *gasp*

I reduced the number of meals I was eating to 3 a day because I felt like 5 was too much with this program.  It wasn't that I was eating bad food, it's that I was consuming a lot of hidden calories trying to get all of the nutrients I felt like I needed.  Too much fruit = too many carbs and sugars - although I can't prove it, I feel like that was the guilty culprit.  Those of you who drink (insert unacceptable amount of alcohol here), this is where you live; I don't know that they're really anything physically good about consuming alcohol.  I'd venture to say it's benefits are purely psychological.  I'm not saying don't drink, I'm saying that you're consuming ridic amounts of calories, carbs, and sugar from something that gives you little to no nutritional value in return.  Just saying...

I'd take the chocolate chip biscuits over the beer.  But that's just me.

I take a multi-vitamin and an omega-3 pill everyday so I figured I'm getting 90% of what I need for the day there, thus making up for whatever I don't physically consume.  This main point is eat less.  Although I wasn't eating on Mondays and Fridays I was still working out with the same routine as I did when I had eaten.  Force yourself to work harder; remember, your mind gets tired long before your body does.  On Fridays I motivated myself by thinking of all the d'licious food I was going to be able to eat because of the workout I was doing, and on Mondays I just told myself I was a fat had to be punished for my caloric indiscretions.  Whatever floats your boat. 

Results

As the date for MEPS neared, I was instructed not to do any type of physical fitness 48 hrs prior to the actual date:  apparently it working out puts protein in your urine?  Not sure how that happens, but if someone who's been doing this for 198246 yrs tells you not to do something, you don't really question them.  MEPS was on a Monday, which meant I couldn't workout after Friday.  I decided to make Thursday my last workout just to be on the safe side.  Since I couldn't burn a high amount of calories by working out I simply ate less those two days, essentially fasting over the weekend as well.

In my post about joining, I mentioned how I had to make sure I could still eat breakfast without going over the weight requirements.  I had a very small dinner at 5:00pm the night before MEPS and a couple of granola bars (which I ate for psychological pleasure).  I figured I'd be OK eating these since I really hadn't eaten that much prior to arriving at the hotel that day and the dinner rations were meager at best.

Long story short, I went from 148 in late September to 138 lbs on October 7th.  Even moms said she noticed I was getting smaller.  Because they also measure you if you don't make the weight requirements, I was also losing weight to make my hip and waist measurements go down.  They did:

- Hips:  before = 40", after = 37"
- Waist:  before = 32", after = 31"
- Neck:  before = 14", after = 13"

Not huge changes, but they got the job done.  I don't know what those measurements equate to in terms of Naval standards for BMI, but since I was 138 lbs, they didn't have to measure me. 

Weren't You Hungry??

Of course I was.  You'd be hungry too if you didn't eat anything for 12 hrs.  But I wasn't as hungry as I thought I'd be.  I didn't pass out, didn't get light headed or weak.  In fact, I was able to do 1.5 - 2 hr workouts on nothing but the dinner from the night before.  Before I started fasting I feared hunger pangs; the minute I felt a twinge of one I ate something.  With the fasting I had to adjust my mode of thinking:  hunger pangs just meant my body was dipping into its tragically plentiful fat supply.  I imagined myself physically shrinking and more importantly, making weight.

You're not going to be in pain if you don't eat.  Trust me, you'll survive.  The human body can go daaays without food and/or water, so a few hours won't kill you.  If you're really concerned about going for so long without food, eat a late dinner the night before.  It helps.  I usually eat on the late side anyway since I don't get home from the gym until 7-8pm.  After I shower and cook the food, it's about 9-9:30.  You also have the option of having a light snack before gym if you're concerned about working out on an empty stomach.  I experimented with a few things and I found greek yogurt works great for this.  But you really don't need anything.  Here's the thing:  if I can hit PRs on the deadlift and run on the treadmill for 15 min, you'll survive. I'm 100% sure the rest of the world isn't as intense as I am at the gym, therefore I'm equally as sure fasting won't kill you.

What I Learned

The main thing I learned from this was that you can survive if you're hungry.  The first few times you do it are the worst, but that's because you have to change your thinking.  I used to get hungry around times I used to eat before I was fasting.  The human mind is highly trainable; the external forces that make you think about eating are called triggers.  They're purely psychological.  Smokers have triggers that make them want to smoke.  Drinkers are the same way.  Train yourself to not think about eating and you won't think about it.  I occupy my time at work during lunch.  I'll run an errand or write these here lovely blogs.  Or work on whatever random project I have going on in my life at the moment.  I trained myself to not get hungry around meal times and now I don't start getting hungry until I'm fixin' to head to the gym.  And when in doubt, don't provide yourself with options:  I don't keep food at my desk, nor do I keep change for the vending machine. 

Humpty Dumpty

Now let me preface this section with this statement:

I have nothing against fat people and I know losing weight if hella difficult for some people.  I don't cast judgment on fat people or make fun of them when I see them.  Real talk, I'm always hella happy when I see them in the gym because the first step in weight loss is actually trying.  I don't think I'm perfect nor do I think everyone should aspire to look like me.  I am a gym crackhead.  All the peoples in all the world can't be gym crackheads because gyms would be overcrowded and I wouldn't get my turn on the squat rack.  Sometimes I feel sorry for big people when I see them.  This is not to be confused with pity; I feel sorry for them because I'd like to think no one would willingly choose to be big in a world where small is style.  I feel sorry for them because I know many people who actually put forth a great deal of effort, sometimes exceptionally risky effort, to lose the extra lbs.  I'm fully aware weight loss isn't as easy as I make it sound, otherwise no one would be fat.  When I say "it's simply", part of that is sarcasm.  And part of it isn't...

So there's this chick in my life who for reals resembles Humpty Dumpty.  I won't go into details about who or where I see this girl, but those of you who follow me on the Book will be able to put 2 & 2 together.  What pisses me off about her is that she doesn't have to look like that.  In my mind, there are only 3 reasons to be that fat:

1. You have a medical condition that makes you gain weight.
2. You are taking medication that makes you gain weight.
3. Your cognitive functions aren't running at 100%, and I believe you know exactly what I'm hinting at here.

I wish this were an exaggeration...

Granted, there are varying degrees of fat, ranging from plump to complete devastation.  This chick is that max level:  complete devastation.  I say again, it pisses me off because she doesn't have to be.  She's a really pretty girl, but at 4'11" you simply cannot be tipping the scales at 200 lbs.  Ain't not doctor in the world gon' say that's a healthy weight for that frame, not matter how it fits you.  At 23-24 yrs old, that's unacceptable.  Your body is suffering:  Your intestines are a mess because all you do is eat crap all day - not a veggie in sight, your heart is a mess because the only exercise you get is moving from the couch to the fridge and back again, your arteries are all clogged from the crap you got from said fridge, your teeth are probably a mess from eating unsightly amounts of sugar,  your hair and skin are suffering because chances are you're not eating healthy foods to get the essential nutrients to keep them healthy, and your joints/bones are literally slowly dying because of all that excess weight they have to lug around.  At 4'11" your knees are not designed to carry 200 lbs around on a daily basis.  This type of weight carrying isn't like lifting weights at the gym.  I lift heavy for an hour a day, then go back to normal body weight.  This chick carries around 200 lbs 24 hrs a day, 7 days a week.  Her joints get no rest.  I don't workout on Sundays because like Jesus, my knees also rest on the 7th day.  Her muscular-skeletal system never gets to rest.  That's a tremendous amount of weight to have on such a small frame, and I get pissssssed every time I look at her.  She can barely move her legs to walk and I'm certain she can't touch her toes.  In fact, I don't know that she can even see her fer toes...

I know what she does with her body is none of my business, but she keeps her egg-shaped self in my line of sight all the time, so I can't help but notice things, hence the Humpty reference.  I know she has trouble finding clothes to fit because if I'm this size and can't find decent pants, you might as well go naked at 4'11" 200 lbs, real talk.  I'm sure she doesn't have to be like this.  You simply cannot eat crap and sit behind a desk all day long, then go home and eat more crap, sit, then go to bed.  If she were a child, I'd blame her parents, but as an adult, I can only blame her.  Having jobs that require disrespectfully high amounts of sitting require you to eat less because you're not burning hardly anything sitting on your butt all day long, TRUST ME.  Everyone at my job is fat but me.  People who started here after me have even gained noticeable amounts of weight.  People here are so fat Weight Watchers comes to us to have bi-weekly meetings!!  Literally.  Now y'all can't tell me that ain't shameful!!

I say again, I'm not saying everyone needs to be a gym crackhead.  In fact, you don't even need a gym or a personal trainer (so trainer friends) to be healthy.  You can make healthy food choices at the supermarkert and walk/run outside for free.  You can do burpees in the comforts of your own home and get a quality sweat on from that.  If you're feeling extra daring you can invest in a bike.  If you have a little bit of coin you can invest in a gym membership and go 2-3 times a week.  You don't have to go to the gym everyday or spend hours there.  Real talk, you can get a quality workout in 50 min, 2-3 days a week.  If you get a personal trainer, that's they're going to have to come in for sessions for the same amount of time and frequency.  Don't be intimidated by my 2 hr sessions; I have no social life, thus the copious amounts time for weights.  If you don't know what you're doing, Google it.  YouTube anything you're curious about.  If you're self-conscious about going tot he gym, buy yourself some weights and check YouTube for some workouts.  The internet is a beautiful thing, people.  I've been lifting for 13 yrs and I still check YouTube on the daily for ish.

Conclusions

I actually like being smaller.  In all honesty, I haven't seen the 130s since high school...I've missed them greatly.  I like the way my clothes fit at this size.  I didn't think it was a visible difference until Milk Dud at the gym said my arms looked incredible and used me to motive one of his clients.  I'm glad it's noticeable, but that's not the reason I did it:  Aside from the Navy thing I'm gad I was actually able to lose weight for once in my life.  I'd been trying for years to get down to this size.  I'm actually planning on going down to 130-135 lbs by summer 2014 using this method, so hopefully I'll be able to do it before leaving for boot camp.

Since MEPS I've allowed myself a little leniency in terms of eating, so I'm about 141 right now.  That's right about where I'd like to say that way it won't be too difficult when I need to slim down again.

Lifting While Pregnant

I happened upon this last night and it gave me a chuckle, mostly because it's foretelling my future.  That is, if I decide to have children, which at the tender age of 24 is still TBA.

The article poses this question:  Should pregnant woman lift weights?  If you know anything about me, you already know my opinions on that, but I thought it was funny that the question was asked in the first place.  Being pregnant isn't a handicap; the walking incubator is still (presumably) a fully functioning human...she just happens to also be carrying another human in her stomach.  As long as she's not slamming anything against her stomach, I see no reason why she couldn't lift weights.

Society vs. Female Lifters

I've talked to you guys about this before...about how people think women are too fragile to lift weights...about how we'll somehow damage our ladies parts...about how our uterus will fall out, and how lifting magically prevents you from having children.  I've been lifting for 13 yrs and trust me when I tell you my uterus is just fine.  And for those who have seen me in person, you know I'm muscular but I don't resemble a man - another myth about female weight lifters.  While I have your attention, allow me to dispel some additional rumors:

Women will get buff like men if they lift weights.  False.  Women will get buff like men if they take steroids.  Do you know what steroids are?  Artificial testosterone.  Testosterone builds muscle (when taken for weight training purposes).  Men naturally have almost 20x more testosterone than women (or something to that effect), which is why they have beards, deep voices, and get hella buff when they lift.  Don't take steroids, and this won't happen to you.  Just that simple (see exhibit A). You can look at her face and see the softness is going; she's starting to get the physical characteristics of a dude.  That ain't hot, at least in my opinion.

There is a certain level of physicality women can naturally achieve with proper diet and a quality workout regime (see exhibit B).  Unless you add something to this equation, you have a 0 chance of looking like exhibit C.

Lifting will prevent you from having children.  I know women who lifted when they were younger and they had children, as many as they wanted, so that's a stupid and unfounded myth.  Again, steroids may cause child-birthing issues, but you did that to yourself.

Exhibit A
N0.

Exhibit B
Andreia Brazier

Exhibit C
Kai Greene

 *SN* The circumference of Kai Greene's chest is the same as the length of my entire body...

 You'll lose your boobs if you lift weights.  I'm a very full 34DD.  So there's that.  All that crap exhibit A took to get like that is what eliminated her boobs.  I do push-ups and bench.  Still DD.

Lifting weight makes you gain weight.  This is true at first because muscle weighs more than fat.  But you'll soon start to lose weight because muscle burns more calories than fat.  Muscle toning also helps with fat loss, not to mention you'll look 91247x better with a toned, slim body than you will with a slim body full of saggy nothingness.  IDK what this foolishness is with girls saying they only do cardio.  That's like saying you only walk in one direction.

Lifting With Baby

If these are 25s I'd say that's too much...at least for me...
at least if I was carrying a baby human

Overall, I'm pro this idea.  I think as long as the incubator isn't lifting hella heavy weights or doing things movements that put her carrying case in harm's way, I don't think she's doing any harm.  As long as you talk with your doctor before you do anything, I think you're fine; I can't imagine you'd harm the baby doing overhead press.  On top of that, lifting is good for the incubator's health.  Just because you're carrying a baby human doesn't mean you need to gain ridic amounts of weight.  That ish is hard to get rid of once the baby human is out of it's knapsack.  And don't be blaming the baby either...baby didn't make you eat all them donuts.

IDK how you would even keep proper form
with a knapsack that big

From a lifter's perspective, I can't imagine being able to do too much with all that extra going on in the frontal region.  I certainly wouldn't be squatting excessive weight since the pressure from the bar would probably cause your baby to fall out in front of you.  The kettle bell stuff you see the girl doing in the article isn't bad either.  I can't imagine that having anything to do with baby.  Deadlifts would probably be out for me because I can imagine your center of gravity is distorted with the addition of another, abet smaller, human.  Simply put:  your stomach would be in the way.

There would also be some concern about the spinal region, but don't hold me to this since I don't know exactly how difficult it would be to carry a baby human in a knapsack.  This would be something to discuss with the doctor.  I'm sure they'd probably advice against lifting the amount of weight the woman above appears to be squatting, but I'm not a doctor.

Also, these pics are extremes.  There are 389146 different weight lifting exercises you can do that clearly don't have anything to do with your knapsack, nor do they require straining it.  Things to consider, America.

The Great American Double Standard

So you judge the hell out of women for being fat post-pregnancy but you don't want them to do things to keep that from happening while they're pregnant?!  Have several.

Let's think about this for a min...

No need for a sitter, bring baby along.
The cost-efficient and healthy option.

Let's say an incubator finds out she's with child at 3 months.  According to you, she's supposed to spend the next 6 months sitting, eating, and not moving until the baby is born.  You do realize how ridic that sounds, right?  No wonder incubators blow up like houses during and after they deliver.  She's carrying a human; that doesn't make her an invalid.  She didn't lose a leg or a lung.  She's the same person she was before she got k-nocked up.

If you married a weight lifter, she'll lift right up until her due date.  Heck, she'll probably lift the morning before the baby is born.  I encourage you not to expect this to change.  If you married a non-lifter and you don't want her to get fat on you, I suggest convincing her to start lifting.  And if you're a female non-believer in the weight lifting movement, I suggest you start believing before your husband leaves your fat butt with the baby for a exhibit B listed above.

Review of McDaniel's Gym

 Last Thursday was the first time I used McDaniel's gym.  On a scale of 1-10 with 10 being the best, I'd give it...well, allow me to explain first...

The Facility

This is the font of the gym.  Those doors are exit only.
The entrance is around the other side.  I think that's stupid.

This has to be the smallest gym I've ever been in, and I've been in quite a few.  It had two floors, but for real for real, it was unnecessary.  The gym is part of the building the houses the basketball courts, classrooms, and Exercise Science & Physical Education  department, which also includes all of their fancy sciency-ness stuff.  Essentially the gym appears to have been built as an addition to the building itself; it's much fancier than the rest of it...unless it got the funding for an upgrade and the rest of the building didn't.

It's got a 100% glass front that faces the parking lot.  That's great for people like me who get the privilege of parking in that lot.  The real gag is that all four doors are locked from the outside, thus the gym can only be accessed from the side door used as the main entrance for the entire building.  Not sure what the purpose was for that, other than to make people walk in front of the front desk welcome man for the building.  But since he usually ain't paying attention, safety can't possibly be a factor.  Plus the gym has it's down check-in table, thus I was hella annoyed after discovering this.

The view from the 2nd floor is d'licious

On the first floor you have the weights, free and machine.  The machines are in one section and there's a separate room where the free weights are.  The top floor has all of the cardio and ab stuff.  It was surprisingly sparse up there for a school with a football team...

It stays open until 11PM which would be awesome if I lived on campus.  SMCM should take note of this.

The Equipment

The equipment was average, nothing special to report there.  What really interested me was the clear emphasis on weight training and the de-emphasis on cardio.  The cardio area was tiny.  And I mean it had 4 elliptical machines, 4 gazelle thingies, and 8 treadmills.  That's really not a lot if you think about it...I've seen that many Mexicans pack into one car.  They had a couple flat screen TVs in the area, but nothing fancy.

This is the cardio area.  Got this from Google...
the machines are arranged differently now.

I've moved away from machine weights for the most part, so I didn't really go over there.  What I really liked about this place were the multiple squat racks they had.  These were real racks...manly racks...racks on rack on racks.  There were 6 of them and one assisted one that got no love was off in the corner.  Each one had it's own platform attached to it that was padded on each side so it wouldn't sound like the apocalypse was happening every time someone dropped the bar.  This is a blessing for deadlifters because I can focus my energy on doing quality 1x1 instead of worrying about quietly lowering the weight to avoiding public shame.  A deadlift is just lifting the weight, ain't nobody say nothing about putting it down...

Aside from that, it was pretty ordinary.  It looked kinda old though, much older than the rest of the gym...like maybe that was the original gym and the other parts were newly renovated areas/additions.  Some of the free weights looked like they were part of the original gym, and you may take that however you want...

The People

It wasn't crowded at all, which was good because I really don't feel like being bothered with crowds after driving for 2 hrs to get there an sitting through 2.5 hrs of class.  Overall, it was mostly white, frat-looking boys and skinny, wealthy freshmen 18 yr old white girls.  in other words, children and brutes.  It could be worse.

But of course those are just guesses.  I didn't see any brown girls, and the only brown boy appeared to be a football player.  All the white girls kinda looked the same...either freshmen or sophomore...preppy...skinny...and sans yoga pant - I'm sure that last part will change with the seasons.

Everyone was pretty nice though.  No one actually spoke to me, which doesn't really bother me all that much.  I'm sure I stood out to them, between this chocolaty skin and these muscles.  Everyone stared though.  I'm not sure if that was because of the muscles or the fact that I'm brown, or the fact that they've never seem me before.  It's likely a combo of the three.

2012-2013 team

I saw the women's basketball team on my way in. They stared at me...I'm not sure why since I wasn't dressed like I was about to play ball.  I thought it was funny so I stared back.  One guy stared so hard when I walked by he actually turned all the way around to watch as I walked by.

*SN*  Guys, ladies have the same perif vision you do, meaning we can see you look at us from a lateral angle.  You ain't foolin' nobody.

Real talk, maybe I give off an unfriendly black hottie vibe.  Wouldn't be the first time I've been told that.

The Overall Feel

Overall, wasn't too bad.  I could get used to it.  I'm still surprised how small it is though.  Maybe there's a part 2 somewhere on campus I'm missing?  I'll look at the map later, although I don't think I am.  It seems a little inadequate for a school that has undergrad and graduate level exercise science programs...and 21479 sports teams.  But whatevers; maybe they like to share.  The equipment is fine, there's just not a lot of it.  Odd.

The best part about it was the fact that it wasn't crowded...in fact, it was surprisingly sparse considering the time (6:00-7:30PM).  Maybe everyone was eating dinner?  Who knows.  We'll see if next Thursday is different.

Rating

7.5/10 - It'll do for the time being.  I only have to be there once a week this semester, so we'll see if things change in the spring.  I feel like I should give it an 8, but something about it feels empty...like it's missing something.  Maybe it's because I'm used to using a real gym now?  But it's pretty good as far as small college gyms go.

The Damnedest Things You See at the Gym

No matter what gym I go to, there are always the most ridic people there doing the most ridic things.  If only people knew what they looked like...not that I want to discourage anyone from going to the gym for the first time, but like I said before, if it looks feels wrong, it probably is.  If you have questions about a how to do something at the gym, ask someone who works there.  Like for real.  Or if you're a girl, ask a guy.  They looove to feel like they're helping the damsel in distress.  I've been working out for 13 yrs and I still ask guys for help when I want them to do something for me.  It's one of the many perks of being a female.  And fellas, don't act like you don't looove feeling like you're needed.  Besides, we both get something out of it:  I get you to move heavy weights I don't feel like lifting and you get bonus points towards your ego.  It's a win win for everyone.

Makeup for the Mall Not the Gym

Excuse the B word, but this is totally accurate.

With that being said, I don't really see women doing too many ridic things at the gym.  My issue with them is attire.  I can't even with chicks that wear makeup to the gym.  You're clearly not their to workout, you're looking for a date.  Sad thing is, a fit girl getting her workout on is often just as sexy as a non-sweaty girl with a face full of makeup.  Not to be racist, but this rule almost exclusively applies to white girls.  Almost everyday I spy with my little eye someone wearing copious amounts of foundation and penciled on eyebrows.  Now I understand you're coming from work/school and whatnot, but that's what makeup removers are for.  I keep a pack in my gym bag for that very reason.  I can't be sweating in eye shadow.  For one, eye shadow + sweat = stinging blindness.  Second, you mess around and forget you have that ish on and go to wipe your face...wipe off one eye and be lookin' like a psycho the whole time you're at the gym while you think you look cute.  Guys will be looking at you, all right.  They'll be trying to figure out why you only put makeup on one eye instead of two.

Sistas aren't excluded from this entirely.  I've seen ladies, typically older ones with lipstick on.  I don't get that either.  That ain't even comfortable outside the gym; you can't be focusing on not rubbing your lipstick off and lifting weights.  One does not squat 1.5x their body weight and focus on lipstick unless one has magical powers.  Chances are if a guy is looking at you, he's intimidated by the amount of weight you're lifting and not your bright red lipstick.

High Fashion is for the the Runway Not the Gym

Here today,
gone tomorrow haha

Ladies ladies ladies.  One word:  Spandex.  We know why we wear it, and I say we because I'm guilty of this one myself.  We want guys to see the payoff of all our hard work.  I actually wear mine most of the time because t-shirts on upper body day are too restricting in the boob area, and I never to long pants at the gym because it makes my legs feel funny.  Real talk, I do spandex shorts because they keep me from chaffing.  But you...you wear it for non-valid reasons.  I see you...overly tight shirts and yoga pants, both of which are completely dry because you're too busy trying to look good to do any real work.  And the men folk notice you too.  The funny thing is, and this really applies to white girls, you give the false impression of a booty in yoga pants, but when you slip on a pair of jeans, said booty completely disappears!  I don't even know what happens, and real talk, I'd be pissed if that were me.  This witchcraft you practice...this disappearing booty trick...it's hilarious to sistas.  Don't change a thing.  I certainly understand why white girls love the yoga pant though.  If there was an article of clothing that could give me an extra body part I wasn't already blessed with, I'd own 91412 pairs of them too, shoot.  I ain't even mad atcha.

Either Do it Right or Sit Down Somewhere

This is NOT the right way to do a bicep curl.

Men, as I posted on the Book:  You're much more impressive to women when you lift small amounts of weight well as supposed to large amounts of weight poorly.  Granted, this is really only noticed to us women folk who know the proper way to do things, but still.  You look like a baby deer lifting weight that doesn't belong to you.  For example, the 3 upper class, frat boy stooges at the gym last night were a prime example of this:  combined, they weighted 200 lbs.  The oldest two insisted upon warming up with 135 lbs on the squat rack.  Now, it's entirely possible for a slim fella to be able to lift this.  However, said slim fella would surely know not to warm-up or come anywhere near his max.  Folks, them lil' legs was wobbling so much...he wasn't even coming all the way down because he knew he couldn't get back up.  That's a clear sign that the weight is too heavy.  Ironically, the littlest fella was like, "ummm why are you guys starting with 45s??!".  They shunned him but he was smart enough to change the weight when it was his turn.  This grasshopper will go far in life.  The other two fools won't.  One of them will surely lose a knee in the future as his form was literally tow' up from the flo' up, and essentially wasted his time because half-assing a squat is basically doing NOTHING.  And the Justin Beiber haircuts weren't helping the cause.  I was LOLing all over the place watching them.  The littlest one clearly had the most brains.  He was telling them they had to go down at least another foot before they were actually doing anything.  And he was right.  He must have gotten all his gold stars in kinnie garten for listening and following directions.

As a (moderate?) buff girl who lifts for reals, I absolutely love watching guys watch me lift.  Y'all do realize how mirrors work, right?  If you can see me, there's a good chance I can see you.  My favs are the ones that try to out lift me as though we're in this is some kind of unspoken competition.  I'm curling 25s and you go grab 35s and strain your way to a torn bicep.  Or the shoulder press...you know 45s are too heavy for you.  Y U NO grab 25s?  Just because I'm using 25 doesn't mean you can't.  I use what weight is good for me, and I suggest you do the same.  But if you insist upon "proving" your manhood, at least make sure I'm around to watch you make a spectacle of yourself.

Not properly lifting weights or lifting weight that is too heavy for you can cause serious injury and if you don't know that already, you shouldn't be in the gym.  Real talk.

Awkward People Masquerading as Normal

Oh the people I see at the gym.  There's one guy who appears to have jaundice, although I've never actually seen anyone with jaundice so I don't know what it looks like.  But he's yellow and so is his hair, and I'm not talking about blonde.  Not making of fun, he's just interesting to look at.  He's either really weird or has some other mental issues going on.  Either way, love his dedication.  Dude's in there everyday with me.

And there's this weird white man who always stares at me even though he's working out with his wife all the time.  I'm not sure what that's about, but I think he admires the work ethic or something like that.  He commented on something I was doing once or twice, but I told y'all I be payin' people dust; in one ear, out the other when I'm spoken to at the gym.

Sometimes this face carries over into non-gym life.
Which would certainly explain why I have no friends...

And there's this weird culture at my gym of magazine reading.  And by at "my" gym I mean gyms across America.  This is a great way to pass the time, but my stars, I saw a whole line of magazine readers on the stationary bikes last night and not one of them had a single bead of sweat on their body.  America, this is unacceptable.  One does not pay $65.99/mo. to sit on a bike, read a magazine, and create no sweat beads.  You could do that is at home; just sit on your couch, make believe you're on a bike with your legs, and read.  When I was at LifeTime I used to read the paper on the bike, but I always worked up a sweat.  These book worms be all in the article and be forgettin' why they're there.  Pitiful.

*SN*  Stop this.  You're wasting the time of those who would actually like to use the machines and sweat on them.

There's also this guy who counts out loud.  America, don't do this.  You learn in kinnie garten how to count silently to yourself.  If you don't know that ish by 30, don't ever leave the house again.  I should not hear you loudly counting out your reps.  In other words, your external counting should not impede upon my internal count.  Better yet, stop counting and just do the exercise until you physically can't do it anymore.  That's better for you anyway, shoot.  And that little piece of fitness advice was brought to you by me.  Now go forth and spread the good word.

Counting Man also prances on the treadmill.  I mean, technically he's running, but his run looks like a prance.  If you can imagine a 6'0" man prancing...now hold onto that image for when times get tuff.  The next time something goes wrong in your life, just remember:  at least you don't prance on the treadmill.  And he gestures with his hands too, but it's more like weird jerking then playing whatever instrument he's hearing in his iPod.  He always catches my eye when I'm next to him on the stairmaster because he looks like he's swatting at something or about to fall off.  As you can see, I get a great deal of joy from watching Counting Man.

Desperadoes and the Dating Scene

I often wonder why God gave men the innate desire to be impressive to women.  Men are such suckers.   You'll lift until your arms fall off if you think a girl is looking at you.  Or what's worse:  you'll talk her to death while she's tryna get her fitness on.  There was a lovely (couple?) at the gym last night on the treadmill.  They were going at a fairly decent pace; this clearly wasn't their first time at the rodeo.  But what was really funny about them:  the guy kept trying to make convo with the girl and she clearly wasn't about that life in the moment.  He just kept talking and talking...asking her questions and whatnot.  But when she did respond, she gave one word answers.

***Fellas, one word answers a typically "girl" for please stop talking.  ***

This chick was for reals tryna get her fitness on:  she had the treadmill incline up and had to have been going at least 4.0 speed on it...I mean, she was cookin'.  Her male counterpart was too busy focusing on chatting her up to be about that treadmill life.  He only started focusing on his treadmill when she literally stopped responding to him.  Shame it had to come to that.  If y'all aren't a couple, thou shall not be getting the digits after that one.

Jealously & Envy are a Woman's Game

Monday, as always, was leg day.  So I'm at the squat rack getting my squat on, right, and this little white girl starts using the assisted squat rack behind me.  I pay her dust because I'm in my zone and I could feel a PR coming, but she was quite distracting because she kept walking around the weight area in search of something.  Turns out she was looking for a pair of 10s.  So adorable.

*SN*  Ladies, if you can only bench using that lil' 2.5 lbs plate, just use the dumbbells.  Don't take up bench pressing space with that ish.  Gets my blood boiling every time I see it.  DaFAQ is a 2.5 lbs?!  Sit down somewhere.

Sassy eye.
But sometimes it really is understandable.

But anyways, I'm looking in the mirror and in my perif I can see her looking at me.  Now mind you, but this point I'm probably squatting more than her body weight, literally.  And like I said before, I was paying her dust.  Why do I catch her giving me looks?  For why? (always hated that phrase).  Then later on I'm doing my circuit...she almost decapitated herself turning her head to look at me and give me sassy eye!  For why?!  Dust again.  This isn't the first time I've gotten looks from females at the gym.  I'm sure it's my physique, but I'm by no means a bodybuilder or fitness model, and I certainly don't sassy eye other girls I see that look better than me.  I pay everyone dust at the gym actually...ain't got time to be comparing myself to anyone else.  I do what works for me and I'm happy where I am.

Brown girls just usually stare but don't make faces.  I'm sure their cutting me up in their minds (we're notoriously unfriendly to each other), but at least they're smart enough to not show their emotions.  Sassing someone who can literally pick you up is a very dangerous game; if I can pick you up, imagine how hard I can drop you...

Conclusions

I realize I'm talking about white girls and brown girls a lot, but in all honesty, my gym isn't diverse at all.  You're either brown or an upper class white person.  I'm not complaining, just stating the facts.  There are like 20 brown people, including myself and the gym staff. Everyone else is white.  Oh, and there's this one light brown lady who's racially ambiguous, but we'll include her with the white people she certainly ain't brown.

So in between lifting extremely heavy weights and sweating a lot, the gym offers me a great deal of entertainment on the daily.  Why wouldn't I want to go 5 days a week?  How often is it that life gives you a 2-for-1 deal like that?!

The Powerlifter

Trained with a competitive power lifter yesterday at the gym.  Allow me to tell you a little about him before I go into how ridic awesome he is:

Age:  30
Height:  5'8"
Weight:  184 lbs
Yrs in the biz:  eternity (17 yrs)
Squat record:  545 lbs (8/6/2013)

The man is a beast considering his height.  When I saw him in person he's much shorter than I imagined from his YouTube videos.  I would have been suspect of this 545 if I hadn't seen the video earlier that day before I saw him.  In fact, he did 495 lbs right in front of me.  My mind:  blown.

Bulgarian-Style Training

Even though he's been training for 289146 years, he just started Bulgarian-style training about a month ago.  If you're not familiar with Bulgarian weight lifting, they've basically dominated the sport for the last 30-40 yrs, no joke.  They either currently hold or have broken almost every record and have won 81461 medals in the Olympics since the 70s.  Apparently the one year they weren't "that good" they still had multiple people on the podium.  So there's that.

Ivan Abadjiev

Essentially, the Bulgarian style is all based on the teachings of one man:  Ivan Abadjiev.  His style:  train as hard as possible every time and the body will adapt accordingly.  It's not rocket science but it's hella effective.  You're constantly working at 80-100% of your personal max with this program and building towards working out 8 times 6 days a week.  You start off with three days a week...then add a morning session...then a fourth day...and a fifth day...and another morning session.  Basically you're looking at 8 multi-hour workout sessions.  Of course this is built over time...and not American minutes...like eastern Soviet block minutes.  It takes months get fully get into this routine, which is why it doesn't work for most Americans.  Unless you're training professionally or a jobless moocher, you'll likely not have the time to workout several hours a day, several times a week.

But if you find your little American self with that magical mixture of unrestricted time and access to a gym, this style might be for you.  Feel free to read here before you start.

Our Session

We started off with some squats, surprise surprise.  What did actually surprise me was the fact that he warmed up with just the bar.

*SN*  I'm seriously not understanding this epidemic of people not doing cardio in their workouts.  The only reason I let him slide was because he's trying to bulk and actually has a hard time keeping weight on.  (must be nice)

I guess I'm kinda old school when it comes to lifting, but I always aim for at least 8 reps when I'm doing a set.  That's not the case with power lifters.  They aim for a quality 1.  Granted, he did eventually lift like 500 lbs, but still.  'Tis very odd to me.

"When you're too short for other sports."

My max is 185 lbs.  That's the most I can do and keep good form and not pass out or topple over.  I won't reveal my weight cuz that ain't lady-like, but I'm significantly under 185.  The goal is to eventually get to 1.5x my body weight, which is approx. 200 lbs.  This fella weighed 184 lbs.  When I tell you we almost rand out of 45 lb plates...America...we had people in the gym giving us looks every which way.  At one point this man had eight 45's, two 25's, and two 10's.  I was blown away, and so were the people around us who had stopped lifting to watch.

After the squats we did the bench.  Now I'm gonna be honest with you, I never do the bench because I don't want to mess up my hair/put my head on that nasty bench 1892461 people have used before me.  I do 89124 other chest exercises to make up for it, so I wouldn't say I"m deficient in that area, but my heard did skip a little when he mentioned it.  But it actually went well.  I'm a far cry from my high school max weight of 200 lbs, but that's OK since I was only able to do one rep at that weight anyway.

Conclusions and Other Things of that Nature

Essentially I learned it's entirely possible for small people to lift great amounts of weight. This is important, considering I will never be big.  It's important to note here, that this man was (supposedly - and I believe him) doing this naturally.  As you can see from his height/weight ratio, he is small.  In person, he's not even a big dude.  He even complained about having a hard time keeping weight on.  I don't know what that's about since I ain't never had a problem in that category, but I can imagine his plight considering the field he's in.

I also learned that a single rep is all you need to brag about your accomplishments (although my personal philosophy has some reservations about this).  Constantly stopping after one rep is annoying as (insert expletive here) boring, but it gets the job done for the purpose.  I always feel like I haven't really done anything because I keep stopping every 10 sec.  I suppose I would have exerted more energy if I didn't have that huge break in between sets when he would go, but whatevs.

Last but not least:  I like power lifting.  Don't plan on doing too much of it though, since you really aught to have a spotter when lifting weight like that.  Even this guy used a spotter in some of his videos.  Since I don't have friends a spotter, I'll stick to manageable weight for the time being.

My HIIT Program

So after weeks of prepping, I think I've finally created a solid HIIT training program for both legs and upper body.  If you're interested, keep reading.

What is HIIT?

For those who don't know, HIIT stands for high intensity interval training.  Essentially the purpose of this type of training to elevate the heart rate for a predetermined amount of time with limited rest in between intervals.  For example, you would do 1 min of intense training like...sprinting, burpees, or jump rope, followed by 30 sec of rest, then start the 1 min intensity again.  The limited rest allows you to recover just enough to do the movements but doesn't allow the heart rate to drop, thus increasing caloric burn and improving cardiovascular health.  This is what the Insanity program is based on, hence people's success at dropping considerable amounts of weight using it.

The best part about HIIT:  training time is cut in half because your workout is 10x more efficient.  You can do an entire workout...full body in 25 - 30 min and be sweating and breathing heavy like you just ran a marathon.  Love it.  I went from spending 1:30 in the gym to under an hour and I'm working 15x harder than before.

In all honesty, I've lost more weight and leaned out more post Insanity using this program than I did with the actual program.  And make no mistake about it, nothing is borrowed from that thing other than a couple stretches I do at the end, and those are ones I've been doing for years anyway so technically they're not stolen.  Again, not trying to nag the program, just being honest.

For this program I highly recommended getting this app on your phone.  Don't know what to tell Apple users, but since y'all already know I'm #teamandroid don't be surprised that I'm only provided one link.  I'm sure you can find it in the Apple store.  Milk dud had it the gym...he paid $0.99.  Y'all also know I'm not about that life, so don't be surprised that my app is free.  But anyways, the app will allow you to literally program the entire workout in, rests included, and cycle through it without stopping.  I even programmed in the breaks between sets so I don't have to actually touch it the entire time.  Saves on time and energy and you don't have to bring a notebook and a pencil to the gym like you're about to take notes all the damn time.

My week typically looks like this, pending of course some unforeseen event that I must tend to:

Monday...Legs

Tuesday...Upper

Wednesday...Legs

Thursday...upper

Friday...Legs

You'll notice Saturday and Sunday ain't on the list...remember, I don't workout on those days.  I also squat on both the upper body and leg days, so I'm squatting 5 days a week with 2 full days of rest to let these weary bones recover.  Haven't had any problems yet, other than my knees aching from being triiiied all week long.  They don't hurt, they just feel like I was lifting 185 lbs for a week.

Leg Circuit

First and foremost, everyone should have a leg day and said day should include use of the squat rack if one is using a gym.  I don't know what this notion is of people walking by the greatest lower body machine ever created.  You want to get strong?  Squat.  You want a firm butt?  Squat.  You wanna tone up those legs?  Squat.  So basically what I'm trying to say is...squat.

Left:  Standard squat
Right:  front squat

Now that that's covered, I can get into the actual program.

The actual circuit itself takes exactly 25:30 to complete.  That's 2 sets of 11 movements.  Not bad if you ask me.  After the set you do 25-35 squats and/or deadlifts gradually increasing in weight.  I'll let you determine what weight that is for you.  My personal max is 185 lbs, so I usually do about 20-25 reps of 160 lbs then do 1-2 at the max.  Form is key for me, which is why the max reps aren't as high as you might think.

The actual circuit itself is 11 movements done for :45 followed by :15 of rest.  Then there's a 2:00 break between each set.  If you use the app you can program all of that in and it will tell you all of that, including the break.  It cycles through to the second one automatically.  Pretty hot considering I was doing all of this manually at one point.

The goal here is not to worry about the number of reps you do, just do as many as possible.  If you need a visual demo of any of the movements, check out this guy's YouTube channel.  I've mentioned him before.  He was kinda the inspiration behind this.

***Also, make sure you do some kind of warm-up before this.  I usually hang with my buddy Mr. StairMaster for 10 min or so, then do a few light ab moves and stretch thoroughly before doing this.  The last thing you need is to be doing all this jumping and pull something.***

• Burpee lunges
• Rest
• Rotating squats
• Rest
• Star burpees
• Rest
• Squat pulses
• Rest
• Jumping lunges
• Rest
• Side-to-side burpees
• Rest
• Body weight squats
• Rest
• Knee strike burpees
• Rest
• Ski hoops
• Rest
• Kick out burpees
• Rest
• Single leg plyo
• Break

If for some reason you think you can do this sans breaks, I encourage you to try it.  Don't worry, I'll wait...

...

That's what I thought.  You'll probably get about half way through before you vomit or one of your legs completely falls off.  Or you'll stop half way though one of the sets.  Either way, a break is necessary...helps keep the form and give you a little bit of wind for the next movement.

If you do the circuit correctly, your heart rate should be sky high and your legs should be burning.  Use the 2:00 break in between sets to grab some water since, as you can see, there's not designated water break.

You can take a few minutes to catch your breath after fully completing the circuit because you're going to need it for the squats.  Even though your body is nice 'n' toasty warm now, it's still a good idea to warm up a little by starting with light weight.  A power lifter friend of mine even starts off lifting just the bar and his max is 545 lbs.  I usually do the bar, the add 25 lbs (each side), then 35 lbs, then 45 lbs, then 55 lbs, the 65 lbs.  By the time everything is said 'n' done, I probably do somewhere between 25-35 reps.  I'm not really particular on the number since it's form and strength (and to get a band of minions like this) I'm going for here, but I aim for 3x10.

After that you do 2x15 calf raises, leg curls, and leg extensions (not necessarily in that order), cool down, and stretch.  You don't have to kill it with the leg curls since your quads should have gotten a good workout between the circuit and the squats.  

Total amount of time spent:  approx. 60 min...most of which is depending on how long it takes you to squat.

This circuit coupled with the weights afterward gives you a complete lower body workout.  Hopefully you live on the first floor or have an elevator in your building because chances are you won't be doing too much walking in the upcoming days.

My goals for this:  5 reps at max weight for squats and slowly increase the overall max to 220 lbs.  That might seem like a random number for you, but I'm trying to get to 1.5x my body weight, which is around that amount.

Upper Body Circuit

The upper body circuit is set up just like the lower body one, except...well, with upper body movements. 

• Side-to-side burpees
• Rest
• Dive bombers
• Rest
• Tricep extension
• Rest
• Bicep curls
• Rest
• Squat pulses
• Rest
• Renegade burpees
• Rest
• Star burpees
• Rest
• Bent over rows
• Rest
• Push up jacks
• Rest
• Squat press/clean
• Break

These are done for 45 sec with 15 sec rest between each just like with the lower body.

Total amount of time spent on circuit:  23:30. 

Once you do your squats and wrist curls you'll probably be closer to an hour.  

*SN* Wrist curls aren't anything major...I just like 'em.  Feel free to skip 'em if you want.

Renegade burpees

I'm sure you won't have the arm strength to do anything else.  In fact, you may have even have arms at all.  I've spaced out the free weight exercises because I was finding that my arms felt like (insert expletive here) by the 4th exercise, and I wasn't able to properly do all of the exercises after it.  Sometimes less is better.  If you do this correctly, your arms will basically be immobile for the next day or so.  You've been warned...

Results

So far I've seen fantastical results with this program.  Even the trainers at the gym are seeing a difference...which also signifies that I'm there waaay too often, but whatevs.  I not sure how much weight I've lost since I think scales are devil and lie on the regular, but I've noticed that my clothes fit differently, especially the pants, so there are some obvi changes going on.  Since kid sister is gone, I'm going to tighten up my diet and see if that makes more of a difference.

As you can see, most of the movements in both upper and lower body don't require weights, and the ones that do don't require heavy ones.  You can go to Wal-Mart and put up 2 dumbbells for like $25 and be good to go for awhile.  If I wasn't moderately addicted to the gym and the squat rack that's what I would do.

I like this routine better than Insanity because the voice in my head doesn't sound like a gay man it's shorter and I have the attention span of a small child.  45 min of something is excess to me in my old age, especially when it's physically challenging.  You can do these in your basement while watching a 30 min program and be finished before the program is over.  Quick 'n' sweet, short & to the point.  That's how I like things.  When I was in college and had copious amounts of time, I could do an hour and a half in the gym.  After 2 hrs worth of driving and 8 hrs worth of working, an hour is more than enough...or if you go to Crunch Fitness, 100 min is more than enough (since they don't validate any more than that).

The Importance of Protein Powder

For those who don't know, protein is important.  And no, it's not bad for you...the protein in the jar is the same as the stuff you find in chicken...just more concentrated and infinitely less tasty.  It's best to just get as much protein as possible from regular foods.  You shouldn't be completely substituting powder for actual food; that's not the purpose of the powder, and frankly that's going to be hella expensive for you in the long run.

And for the ladies:  no, it won't make you bulk up like a man.  I'm not sure who your 8th grade science teacher was, but if they told you that, they lied.

You need protein, not just for muscle health but for your overall health as well.  In theory you should be eating some type of protein with every mean.  I've heard it's supposed to be the size of your fist...or something like that.  Of course that may not be possible all the time, but it's still a good thing to strive for.

Types of Protein

There are a bunch of different types of proteins which you can read about here since I don't feel like typing all that.  Professional grade bodybuilders will likely use the more advanced stuff, but you should def talk to your doctor before you start taking anything like that.  I checked with my doctor...she approved of the stuff I use.  There are like 184612 different brands that basically do the same thing, so it's just a matter of which additives you like...or in my case, which jars are on the lower shelves.  The height struggle...

Protein and Weight Training

$50 for 5 lbs.
71 servings

Protein powder is essential to weight lifters and athletes because we kill ourselves our muscles every time we workout.  You may not feel it at the moment, but all that heaving, running, and jumping is asking a lot of your muscles.  And although they're equipped for the challenge, it still takes a toll on them.  The post-workout protein shake helps to repair, rebuild those beat up ol' muscles, and build new bright 'n' shiny ones..or at least healthy ones.  Even if you're trying to lose weight you still need protein because it builds muscles...muscles burn oodles of fat, therefore d'licious protein shakes will help your life.

Now, the downside to protein is that it's a little costly.  My weapon protein of choice is the Gold Standard Whey because it doesn't have a bunch of carbs/sugar, and it's on the low shelves in Vitamin Shoppe.  If you plan on using it daily or taking more than one scoop in a serving, I highly recommend getting the bigger jar.  Mine lasts me 4 months because I only use it when I workout (saves money that way.  Times is hard...the fitness & money struggles are real).  I got my first one in January...didn't have to buy another one til April.  It's the end of July and I still probably have another month left with that same jar, and that's with the double scoopage.  I prefer strawberry banana since I actually like that flavor in other things, plus it tastes good with milk.  Also because I was getting cookies 'n' cream last time and literally getting anxiety attacks when it came time to drinking it.  I wish I was joking.  Kid sister can attest to these attacks.

This is a name brand company, which accounts somewhat for the price.  But typically smaller containers run 2 lbs. for $32.99, and that's only a month's supply.  So like I said, if you're planning on using this stuff for the long haul, just invest in the big jar.  $50 four times a year is better that $33 twelve times a year.  Wal-mart sells the smaller jars for like $25.99 or something like that.  It'll do it you're really in a pinch.

The thing to lookout for with protein is the sugar content.  Some of the off-brands have entirely too many carbs in them to be effective, so make sure you watch out for that.

When to Your Protein Shake

As you can see from this video, some people drink protein several times a day.  Although this is probably ideal, it's not really practical unless you're a professional athlete and/or have $18463 to pay for protein all the time.

*SN*  That's not really an exaggeration either.

For those of us with regular 9-5 jobs, I think once a day will do just fine.  I only take mine after a workout.  2 scoops, which is up from my usual 1 scoop because I'm trying to lean out a bit, aka, make more muscles.  In theory, one scoop will do you just fine.  I've been taking 2 scoops for awhile now and haven't grown a beard or a 3rd leg, so I'm sure I'm not causing any harm.  One top of that, most of the lifters I know take 2 scoops.  They're men, but you know what I always say:  Equal pay for equal work.

Mini automatic
blender for the high rollers.

Manual labor blender
for us blue collar folks.

I prefer to drink my shake with milk because protein + water = horrifying & nauseating, at least for me.  So 8 oz. of milk + 2 scoops of protein = tolerable.  I'll usually have this with dinner since unrefrigerated milk tends to not be so tasty 10-12 hrs later.  If I put it in the fridge at work I'm like 100% sure I'll forget it, therefore I just wait til I get home.  It's only a 25 min drive home from the gym and I snack on some blueberry flavored greek yogurt on the way so I don't pass out from hunger on the beltway.  I know how you Maryland people are...y'all would drive by and not even help a sista out.

Flavors

I have the strawberry banana flavored one...it's not too bad.  I tried the cookies 'n' cream one before...the lies we tell ourselves.  Ain't never had a cookie nor cream that taste like that.  Unacceptable.  A buddy of mine said he didn't understand why the made protein flavors in things that really only go well with milk...makes a good point.

• Chocolate + water?  Watery chocolate almost sounds exciting.
• Vanilla + water?  Sounds worse than the chocolate!
• Strawberry + water?  You had me until you said water.
• Cookies 'n' Cream + water?  Would you dunk an oreo cookie in water?  Didn't think so.
• Strawberry banana + water?  Why water down perfection?
• Banana cream + water?  Looks like the vomit of someone who ate too many vanilla wafers then drank 7146 cups of water.

It comes in a bunch more flavors, but good luck finding them in stores.  Those are the ones I see most often.  So you see, milk is the best choice, although I know plenty of people who would be to differ.  If you can stomach these flavors with water/you don't want the extra calories from the milk, bless yo heart and yo days.

But like I said before, always check with your doctor before taking anything.  I told y'all I learned that lesson the hard way.  I'm sure they won't have a problem with you taking it, if you have a good reason for doing so.